Every day on the Nigerian Internet, there are people who keep our eyes glued to our phone screens as we read their rants, opinions, perspectives on political and social issues, etc. Sometimes, they are just downright ridiculous. We make it our job to take down the names of these noisemakers.
Here are the ones we saw today:
When you reject a man’s advances he resorts to calling you names and all of a sudden you’re ugly but excuse me didn’t you want to suck my breast and kiss me?
Now I’m ugly? Sorry o Shrek.— SB (@QueenSallyb) March 21, 2019
So men do this all the time? Are you serious?
Not getting sucked into religious arguments today.
Remember boys and girls, your religious faith you think is so powerful is really just a function of the birth lottery.
Born in Saudi? Allahu akbar!
Born in Onitsha in 1483? Otito dili Idemili!
Born in Lagos today? Hallelujah!
— Sugabelly ? (@sugabelly) March 21, 2019
How about born Canada because that’s my true country.
1. What is Jordan Peterson
2. Do I even want to know— OluTimehin Adegbeye? (@OhTimehin) March 21, 2019
No sis, no. It’s a trap.
Eba master pic.twitter.com/CTIa5YOpLR
— Wale (@Wale) March 21, 2019
Oga, you are eating only stew?
When she says she’s not in the mood but you manage to stick your hand below and you come out this… Ladies ehn ? pic.twitter.com/xL2ECP3f5q
— Eye of Ola (@NotJustOla) March 21, 2019
i’m ashamed to share the same gender with you.
I stopped a bike at ikeja but one sharp girl just rushed and climbed it. I just passed them now. They fell inside gutter.
— Kobz of Lagos (@MisterKobz) March 21, 2019
Your village people were on your side.
African mom will compare you to one bad coded guy in the street, just because he attends church regularly, But you are not a snitch, so you just keep it moving.
— J O K U N L E (@TheJokunle) March 21, 2019
Iyanya witnessed Ubi beating Emma Nyra for ages and was silent but wants us to sympathise with him because he wasn’t put on business papers. Nigga fuck you and your balloon muscles.
— Cosmic GrooVee (@grooveeshakes) March 21, 2019
#MSMEThursdayWithDipo has been trending for 7 hours. Its still a great opportunity to advertise your small business/hustle, if you are yet to.
— Dr. Dípò | The Career? (@OgbeniDipo) March 21, 2019
You are the doing the Lord’s work.
