Damilola Atayero: First things first (30 days, 30 voices)

by Damilola Atayero


                             “No man respects an empty, unaccomplished lady.”

There is only one key to continuous individual liberation and fulfilment, taking first things first. A baby does not start walking the same day it is born, it has to go through some stages-a learning process.

A Yoruba adage says; “the eating of beans cake starts from the flat part”. The English adage says; “a stitch in time saves nine”, even the Bible says; “there is time for everything.” Such phrases as woman emancipation, liberation and feminism, to me are stale; Considering the present global representation and participation of women in political, religious, cultural affairs around the world, women are now fully liberated from a voiceless figure to a figure that speaks and is heard.

Women are now seen as important, strong figures in nation building but, it is so disheartening that despite this liberation some women are still in bondage; We dishonour, insult, pervert, and abuse our freedom because of impatience. We have gone from the sublime to the trivial. We are in a haste to acquire fame, properties and worthless social respect.

No man respects an empty, unaccomplished lady. Becoming a “big girl” does not solve our problems rather, it leads to more debts and bondage. Taking the last things first does not always lead to destruction but it definitely leads to delay and everlasting regret which is worse than destruction.

There are ladies that are successful today but did not embrace those immoralities that have become rampant and are viewed as normal. Immoral, reckless living is not the fastest way to success; It only introduces us to some perilous aspects and stages of life that could lead to an everlasting psychological illness.

The worse thing that can happen to a person is bondage. Self liberation implies buying an outfit because it is comfortable not because it is seductive. Self emancipation means liberating yourself from the past and walking into a fulfilling future; It involves equipping ourselves with enough skills against slavery. Self emancipation requires getting a sound education and setting plausible goals that would give rise to generations of self liberated females.


Atayero Damilola is a student of the Department of English and Literary Studies, University of Abuja. This is her first published article and she wants it criticized. She tweets from @damcindy.

30 Days, 30 Voices series is an opportunity for young Nigerians from across the world to share their stories and experiences – creating a meeting point where our common humanity is explored.

Op-ed pieces and contributions are the opinions of the writers only and do not represent the opinions of Y!/YNaija

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