by Ezinne Uzoije

I never knew blind graduates could serve the country if they wanted to. I got to know that as a serving Corp member.

One day, at the residential quarters my place of primary assignment (PPA) had made available to Corp members, we were told a blind person would be moving in.  I didn’t understand it at all. I was of the opinion that she should not bother serving. A flat mate chipped in that visually impaired people could do a lot by themselves once they understood their environment.

Some days after, I was going to grab some lunch when the officer overseeing Corp members at my PPA politely asked me to escort the visually impaired Corp member to a hostel. I noted the choice of words. He didn’t say ‘blind’.

I didn’t know the location and his directions were confusing. I asked the lady if she knew the directions and she said “yes”, that she would direct me.

I was befuddled. First, how I imagined she would know the directions and also, how she actually knew the directions. We got talking. I got to know that she had schooled there (my PPA being a University). I also noted a lot of things. She typed in a number in her phone and listened to be sure she typed in the right number. She seemed like someone eager to do as much as she could for herself, despite her condition. She seemed to have positive self-esteem.

I looked at her eyes. They were not sealed close. Funnily she had a strong sense of the environment. She was reeling off what sign board I should see next and the next turn to take. It was ironical. Getting directions from a blind person. It was also my first time of leading a visually impaired person and a young one. I had previously imagined visually impaired people to be aged people only.

We talked about random things and as a curious person, the question about her condition started brewing in my mind. Somehow I felt it would be unsettling for her, but the question ‘How did you lose your sight?’ rolled out from my lips before I firmly decided not to talk about it.

Her response was the exact opposite of what I expected. She was calm, infact seemed a bit pleased I asked.

She told me she lost it in 2009. She already had an eye defect- myopia- but noticed her sight was degenerating. Visits back and forth to many doctors revealed pathological Myopia and later, Glaucoma, but by then it was inoperable. She lost her vision. I asked her if the condition could be reversed and she told me that when she went to India, she was told that it could not be reversed by medical science, unless by some miracle. She was hoping for one. I smiled. I also believe in miracles and know hope can help in trying times.

I felt sad though.  I remembered a lot of things. I remembered my angst when I had a corneal abrasion in December, 2016 after decorating at an event and thought I was losing my sight. I remember paying the consultation fees gladly, just because I heard the comforting words, ‘it will heal’. I remembered when my sister was wrongly diagnosed of Glaucoma and although I kept telling her my visual acuity is worse than yours, it’s not glaucoma. The words didn’t take root immediately. It was not easy hoping for the best but having ‘reality’ glare us at the face. I remembered the relief when we found out that it was not Glaucoma.

But her’s was different.

I didn’t want the sadness I felt to get to her, I decided to talk about other things. I asked if she was on social media and immediately noted how awkward the question was. She said she used Facebook. Another surprise!

I asked her what she studied, she told me she studied English. My face lit up.

‘You could write books you know, do you enjoy writing?!’

‘Yes, I have actually published some poems’

Whoa, I was blown!

Just then we got into the room. She told me ‘meet my fellow blind people’. A female sharply rebuked her and said ‘Visually impaired, visually impaired’ and I wondered what was wrong with the word ‘blind’.

I’m still not sure what is wrong with the word, but I have always thought stories of Helen Keller, Stevie Wonder and Cobhams Asuquo are inspiring even for humans with no physical impairments.

Helen Keller for instance, was not just blind but deaf yet was able to give speeches (that she could not hear), author books and experience music. Radical socialist.

Stevie Wonder having mastery of about 9 instruments, a fine musician in his own right.

Cobhams Asuquo, producer of many internationally acclaimed songs. Professional songwriter.

I think they are great examples of people that may have lost their sight, but didn’t lose sight of their vision; of who they wanted to be.

So, that must be it. They don’t want to be defined by their condition. It sounds a lot easier addressing it as an impairment, a minor imperfection, a launchpad for a perfect landing not as Blindness. End of the road. No hope whatsoever. More like a psychological thing. They want to be seen for their personality, for who they are, for who they are becoming.

Talking with her gave me a new perspective. I dropped the notion that no visually impaired person should serve or bother to be normal.

It was inspirational for me, I found myself thinking how sometimes I hinge on to ‘inadequacies’, ‘imperfections’, as a reason not to go forward in some areas of interest. How I comfortably nestle into excuses. How I do not filter the voices within and choose the ones that encourage me to move forward?

It thought me fresh insights. That I had a choice, that I could empower negative situations to define me, become bigger and subdue me or I could believe I should not be defined by any negative situation and seek for ways to overcome and become a shining light for a person in the dark.

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This entry was submitted as part of the Nigerian Voices competition organized by YNaija.com.

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