When we see sluggish driving, we often assume it’s a woman driving or an elderly person. Extroverts are loud people. Introverts are silent but dangerous. Women are more caring than men. Men are more hard-working than women. The list goes on and on – but the question remains – are generalisations good or bad? Do people realise the dangers that often comes with generalising things and people especially as it concerns gender and gender roles?

In a thread on Twitter, Nigerian men are termed patriarchal and misogynistic. Twitter user, Chuka, shared a story of his Dutch friend who visited Nigeria and the trails that surrounded her visit with the men who wanted a piece of her using all the tactics they know.

The Thread: 

But that wasn't what made me laugh. What made me laugh was her finding out that apart from money, Nigerian men have nothing else to offer. And she was super serious when she said that! She deduced that they weren't intelligent, so most couldn't hold intellectual conversations.

— chuka phillip-jonson (@beejonson) September 13, 2020

Another thing she found super weird was how they kept inviting her to their churches, and offering her marriage. One of them offered to marry her, if she'd agree to become a housewife. They were all perplexed to find that she was neither interested in marriage nor having kids. ?

— chuka phillip-jonson (@beejonson) September 13, 2020

And I've seen it with my two eyes. Nigerian men hate it when a woman is empowered, and isn't impressed by their wealth. It's why they can't stand independent women who don't need their money. In a relationship with such women, they wouldn't know what to do with themselves.

— chuka phillip-jonson (@beejonson) September 13, 2020

In summary, ‘Nigerian men hate it when a woman is empowered and isn’t impressed by their wealth…’ From his story, Chuka addressed marriage, the option of having kids and egalitarian system that doesn’t seem to exist in Nigeria. Chuka may be right in the context of which he made this story, however, will it be correct to define all men from one space?

Nigeria may have thrived as an elitist society for long, but there are many people who share the idea of equality for both genders. Going back to Chuka’s thread, there is nothing wrong if a man is chasing after a woman if his aim is to settle down and have kids. It only becomes a problem where obsessive measures are taken to pressure a woman to marriage or having kids against her will.

See reactions here:

Dunno the part of Nigeria you come from but where I come from, men are more wholesome. We mix with wholesome women and form wholesome connections. Take your offensive lopsided generalisation and toss it in the trash.

— Wolf of Lagos ?? (@SheunAdeola) September 15, 2020

This thread is a wrap.. you have said it all

— DarkBelle (@IAmDarkBelle) September 13, 2020

"Nigerian Men" or "Some Nigerian Men"?

— Favent (@FaventM) September 14, 2020

Nigerian men hate Independent Women!! YOU MUST BE TALKING ABOUT MEN LIKE U but definitely not Men I know! Guess you’re trying to impress a girl with this Mumu Tweet! I’m very Comfortable n been All over D World but has Never looked down on Any woman! Nigerian men R most loving

— Ayoola (@Ayoola50247910) September 14, 2020

Chuka may have taken a heavy swipe at the misogynistic and patriarchal men, however, his generalisation attacks the reality that every man wants different things.

We should not also forget that these generalisations have longed been influenced by certain standards that the society has been built upon. Nigeria has thrived as a patriarchal society for the longest and it is no wonder that certain generalisations like this become the topic of debate every now and then.

Till we strip society of the idea that men are above women in every aspect of life, these generalisations will continue to be a thing.