Counter Culture Blog

[The Sexuality Blog] Back to Basics: Is solicitiation sexual harassment?

One of the unexpected consequences of access to social media is encountering scenarios and alien to one’s lived experiences and how people react to those scenarios. These reactions, often spurred by ignorance have necessitated the back to Basics series and it seems, has necessitated a discussion about sexual harassment. The ‘unholy’ trinity of non-consensual sexual... Read More

Counter Culture Blog

The Sexuality Blog: Are you C.I.S?

In the last two months handling the sexuality blog we’ve come to realise that a big part of the problem with prejudice towards LGBTQ persons is ignorance. And this ignorance, while unpleasant cannot be entirely be the fault of the ignorant. Sexuality and how we understand has simply moved much faster than most people can... Read More

Counter Culture Blog

The Sexuality Blog: Sex work is not prostitution

Yeah I said it, sex work is not prostitution. Part of acknowledging that the world is far more complex than we previously conceived is being willing and ready to change the language we use to describe thing. Language matters; to name a thing is to have power over it. The checkered history of the word... Read More

Counter Culture Blog

The Sexuality Blog: Last weekend proved we’re still fighting people instead of institutions

It might seem like we’re dwelling on Chimamanda’s ‘TERF-Gate’ (that’s what we’re choosing to call it here on the Sexuality Blog) but considering how far reaching the ripples of her one minute statement has proven, we’ve been shown yet again that even the countries we look to as our vanguards of feminism and inclusion are... Read More

Counter Culture Blog

The Sexuality Blog

The Sexuality Blog: Is gender different from sex?

With all the furore that has happened in the last week around Chimamanda’s comments about trans-women, Nigerians home and abroad who were only starting to contend with the idea that comfortable in skin (cis) women deserve equity with men and sexual minorities (the gay and lesbian communities exist) are suddenly thrust into a whole new... Read More

Counter Culture Blog

[The Sexuality Blog] TERF-DOM: Chimamanda clarifies her ‘transphobic’ comments, but it won’t be enough for many

Do we need to explain that interview? If you haven’t heard about it, you should probably click here and catch up. And if you have, then you already know that Chimamanda’s comments about the transsexual experience had LGBT activist groups on twitter labelling her a Trans Exclusionary Radical Feminist, the feminist equivalent of the KKK.... Read More

Counter Culture Blog

The Sexuality Blog: It turns out Chimamanda Adichie is human after all

Unless you’re a Nigerian without access to social media, or really any kind of media, you’ve probably heard of Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie. The only contemporary black literary icon who has as much political and social influence as Adichie is probably Warsan Shire and both have collaborated with Beyonce, the biggest contemporary popstar in the world.... Read More

Counter Culture Blog

[The Sexuality Blog] Back to Basics: Does a rape victim bear any of the blame?

We at The Sexuality Blog are revisiting the basics, and as best we can, explaining the concepts of sex, consent and the different aspects of rape culture with analogies that are specific to Nigerians. We are also trying to answer a number of questions that revolve around rape culture and how our current beliefs and... Read More

Counter Culture Blog

The Sexuality Blog: Toxic Masculinity affects everyone, even you

The Huffington Post recently put out an article that puts in perspective a very specific problem: America’s epidemic of gay, lonely, men. While the article majorly profiles white, comfortable in skin gay men (as often happens when major journalistic organizations investigate LGBT issues) it raises some serious points. Of all the LGBT groups marginalized as... Read More

Counter Culture Blog

The recent NOI Polls on Female Genital Mutilation should give you serious pause

NOI Polls the premium polling service in West Africa on the 3rd of March released stats from their latest poll on Female Genital Mutilation (FGM). For all intents and purposes F.G.M. has been outlawed across the country but unofficially it continues to thrive across the country spurred by superstition, harmful cultural practices and in rarer... Read More

Counter Culture Blog

Female Genital Mutilation, NOI Polls

The Sexuality Blog: Milo Yiannopoulous is every LGBT person at 15

I try not immerse myself in American politics. It’s because I don’t care about what happens there (I do, I know better) but because in the last year American politics has become a pool so full of despair that even a cursory glance will sour your mood. This is why I largely missed the ascension... Read More

Counter Culture Blog

Edwin Okolo, LGBT, Mila Yiannopoulous, Sexuality Blog

The Sexuality Blog: Kemen’s #BBNaija eviction shows we have made progress but we still have a long way to go

Even though we still have a long way to go concerning sexuality, gender and women’s rights; the events of last night on Big Brother Nigeria and the reaction to those events prove we have come a long, long way as Nigerians. For those who don’t follow the Multichoice and Endemol produced reality show, the Big... Read More

Counter Culture Blog

BBNaija, kemen, T-Boss, The Sexuality Blog

The Wedding Party proves New Nollywood is no better at giving women agency than Old Nollywood

It’s been a couple of months since The Wedding Party, arguably the biggest commercial success Nollywood has ever produced hit cinemas and blew everyone right out of the water. Now that the Christmas spirit has waned and we’ve found enough distance to took a proper look at the film, we’ve realised it barely passes muster.... Read More

Counter Culture Blog

The Sexuality Blog: Finally a Nollywood film that gets sex work right

I can’t be the only one who cringes when we see certain topics being treated as the subject of a film. LGBT issues, sexuality and gender, often when these topics are tackled in film, it is always skewered to appeal to certain audiences instead of showing the reality of the situation. I am pretty much... Read More

Counter Culture Blog

The Sexuality Blog: And now, some plastic surgery for your scrotum

In case you didn’t know, Modupe Ozolua isn’t the only person offering plastic surgery options to middle class Nigerians willing to part with a few hundred thousand Naira in exchange for a flatter stomach, bigger breasts and in some rare cases a prettier vagina. There are discreet private clinics in Lekki and Wuse offering the... Read More

Counter Culture Blog

February 22, 2017

The Sexuality Blog: Sex isn’t all it’s cut out to be

“A man might think he needs a pillow to sleep well, but he’ll sleep just as well without one” – Jane Rosenal. Sex is wonderful. Save for possible STD’s and unwanted babies and feelings you really didn’t anticipate catching, sex is largely guilt free satisfaction. It is probably why we obsess so much about it,... Read More

Counter Culture Blog

Benin City, Millennials, stds, transactional sex

February 21, 2017

The Sexuality Blog: Is it really so hard to keep sexual predators out of schools?

In Edo state, a corper put up a picture of a teenage girl, with a caption that made my head spin. This is a student put under his care, a young impressionable girl, conditioned by the nationalistic pride that shrouds the NYSC to look up to this university graduate that has been asked to educate... Read More

Counter Culture Blog

nysc, sex education, Sexual assault, sexual predator, The Sexuality Blog

February 10, 2017

The Sexuality Blog: Just how many LGBT Nigerians are there?

Generational changes are certainly making coming out easier for everyone, young and old in Nigeria despite anti-marriage same-sex laws. Recently, TV personality Funmi Iyanda shared a powerful story about her friend, Akin, who after 51 years was finally ready to come out of the closet and he joins many other Nigerians -some of whom use social media as a platform to unveil their... Read More

Counter Culture Blog

The Sexuality Blog

LGBT

February 8, 2017

The Sexuality Blog: ‘We Are Flowers’ – An anthology celebrating LGBT life in Nigeria

Featuring a collection of creative non-fiction, poetry, art work, photography by straight and LGBT artists, this is the first volume of the annual anthology project, 14: An Anthology of Queer Art, titled We Are Flowers. Launched by 14, (a group made up of Nigerian artists and writers who aim to create a safe space for resistance and expression... Read More

Counter Culture Blog

An Anthology Celebrating LGBT Life In Nigeria

February 5, 2017

The Sexuality Blog: Can we let Miyonse live?

In a country where we have only had one man come out on national television, public declarations of sexuality are a hot topic. A conversation that has surfaced again now that a new season of Big Brother has started, one specifically targeted at Nigerians. One of the housemates, Miyonse has proven himself quite the playboy... Read More

Counter Culture Blog

Big Brother Nigeria, gay, Miyonce, tboss, The Sexuality Blog

January 29, 2017

The Sexuality Blog: Not all men who have sex with men are gay…

Ever heard of the term gay-for-pay? What about MSM? People are slowly coming to terms with the fact that straight is not the only sexual orientation there is out there, and sexuality while often conflated with gender is not the same thing. It has taken public marches and private protests and the lives of many... Read More

Counter Culture Blog

AIDS, CDC, Centre for Disease Control, donnie mcclurkin, gay, hiv, self-identification, sexuality, STI, Straight, The Sexuality Blog

January 29, 2017

The Sexuality Blog: Straight men are actually gay AF

Yeah, I swore. Straight people, especially straight men are gay as hell. They’re so gay they put the ‘masc for masc’/no fats no fems crowd to shame. Straight men are obsessed with your penis. They’re always stealing glances at it, will grope you and tell you to chill out, they were just ‘pranking’ you. They... Read More

Counter Culture Blog

blow job, gay, men, relationship, straight men, The Sexuality Blog, TSB, women

January 22, 2017

The Sexuality Blog: About that coming out story ‘For Akin’

There are coming out stories and there is ‘For Akin’, written by Funmi Iyanda at the request of her friend Akin. A narrative that starts with the death of one friend and weaves through decades with another, coloured by cancer and HIV, spanning continents and boroughs, a story that is as grand as it is... Read More

Counter Culture Blog

Akin, cancer, Funmi Iyanda, gay, hiv, LGBT, The Sexuality Blog, TSB

January 21, 2017

The Sexuality Blog: Repeat after me, promiscuity is a luxury

One of the interesting things social media does is highlight how little we know about the history and politics of the privileges we enjoy. Especially when it comes to our sexualities and our freedom to express and indulge these sexualities. As the recession worsens and the inflation rises, more people are being forced to contemplate realities... Read More

Counter Culture Blog

condoms, luxury, nigeria, Promiscuity, sanitary pads, The Sexuality Blog, TSB, twitter.

January 21, 2017

The Sexuality Blog: Down low spouses are exactly what Nigeria deserves

Noticed that the number of homosexual men and women married to heterosexual partners getting outed is sky-rocketing? Well, we have. From rumours to full on exposes complete with pictorial receipts, more and more Nigerian down low (DL) men and women are getting publicly shamed. Maybe social media has made over-sharing easier, or our generation feels... Read More

Counter Culture Blog

DL, gay, Goodluck Jonathan, homosexual, LGBT, nigeria, The Sexuality Blog, TSB

January 21, 2017

The Sexuality Blog: Are women really their own worst enemies?

It is interesting how religion and culture are often brought up when the rights and sexualities of women are being taken away. That and the frankly reductive idea that ‘Women are their own worst enemies’ and must somehow be saved from themselves. Over the holidays, a friend and I discussed this very sentiment, a discussion... Read More

Counter Culture Blog

africa, culture, Female Genital Mutilation, Gender Equality Act, igbo, nigeria, patriarchy, The Sexuality Blog

January 14, 2017

The Sexuality Blog: Pretty Mike is a troll. Why are you Nigerians enabling him?

It’s not very often that you get the Lagos state government to act on matters of social justice without being publicly shamed on social media first. After all, the dozens of complaints on social media of young men and women being harassed by police officers looking to make a quick buck through intimidation barely... Read More

Counter Culture Blog

Lagos State Government, nigeria, Pretty Mike, The Sexuality Blog, trolls

January 5, 2017

The Sexuality Blog: He who Nigerians will kill they first strip naked

It’s been a few months now since the infamous story of the robber who was lynched in Orile broke. There is often some protest, usually digital, by well meaning Nigerians when a person is lynched in Nigeria, criminal or not. But this one, because of still unsubstantiated suspicion that the robber was actually a child... Read More

Counter Culture Blog

garri, Jungle justice, lagos, mob lynching, nigeria, Orile, The Sexuality Blog, TSB

January 4, 2017

The Sexuality Blog: Have you ever stopped to wonder why people are born ‘straight’?

Nigerians everywhere are slowly coming to terms with the reality that not everyone is heterosexual. That first sentence is phrased that way deliberately because in discussions here about sexuality, one thing is always taken for granted; for sexual minorities to exist, there has to be a majority, and that majority is overwhelmingly heterosexual. Especially here where pressure... Read More

Counter Culture Blog

Bobrisky, gay commnity, LGBTQIA, nigeria, Science, sexuality, sticky, The Sexuality Blog, TSB

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