by Harmony Levin

In the past few years since I took up the fancy title of being called a feminist, or better put, an unapologetic feminist. I usually get eerily happy when someone asks “So you are a feminist?” or “Abi you support feminism?” And I would go on to give a long convincing lecture on why we should all be feminists (? Chimamanda Adichie)

I carried on with this fancy title until I came face to face with the Nigerian reality: our patriarchal society – this is the first challenge most of the male feminists face. Like WTF?! Saying you support women’s rights or gender equality automatically places you as the captain of the Women’s Wrapper squad. Worse is when you subscribe to the various forms of equality such as equality for coloured people, trans, or perhaps gay.

For me I’d like to refer to myself as the realist feminist, one who takes cognizance of humanity first before joining the bandwagon of vox pop. I have decided not to limit myself to the conventional belief of equality, even if this means me being the weird one. Being a Nigerian male Feminist isn’t some special recognition award you carry about, rather, it’s about signing up to being called a woman wrapper, confusionist, or just plain stupid. Because the patriarchal society we live in believes in egoism, and watching a man drop his ego in order to support a bunch of crazy women “seeking to be like men” is akin to madness.

You can condemn the man who beats his wife with a stick, or the agbero who lurks at dark corners waiting to pounce on unsuspecting females. But DO NOT go about evangelizing that women are equal to men: according to Nigerian society, that is not a man’s job. So whenever I’m faced with a difficult challenge to prove my worth as a feminist, such as when I was appointed campaign manager that eventually brought in the first female president of my department, I remember my slogan: Unapologetic Feminist.

Being a Nigerian male feminist you must be ready to ask yourself some difficult questions. You must be ready to face the challenges that come with it. Be ready to be undermined in the presence of other men because of your self interests. Be ready to support women’s rights always, even when it hurts. Be ready to speak against all forms of sexual assault. And be ready to face even more challenges ahead.

Be ready to hold these challenges in a knot-tight bond because you sure will need it to forge ahead in your lone struggle. Cheers!

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Harmony Levin(20) is a writer, speaker and social commentator. An undergraduate student of the University of Uyo, studying History and International studies, a feature writer and editor of Diplomatic Access. A creative director and idea innovator, with high stakes in literature, lifestyle and religion. He is on Twitter as @mactorrr